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Behind The Scenes: The New York Rangers/Columbus Blue Jackets Rick Nash Trade

Genius.
Genius.

As you know, I have the inside scoop on the conversations between NHL GMs and front office management personnel. I like to use this inside information whenever a big move is made, and today the Columbus Blue Jackets and New York Rangers combined to make one big move.

The New York Rangers acquired Rick Nash, a 3rd round pick, and a minor league d-man for Artem Anisimov, Brandon Dubinsky, Tim Erixon, and a first round pick. Here's how the deal happened.

Glen Sather- Hey Scotty boy how's it hanging?

Scott Howson- Very well, I still have my job! Isn't that unbelievable?

GS- I really don't care, Scott, no one does. Can I have Rick Nash?

SH- We went over this at the trade deadline, we went over this at the draft, here we go again. You can have Rick Nash if you give me Ryan McDonagh.

GS- OK Scott, but I have new information. Did you know what Ryan McDonagh translated into Swedish is? Tim Erixon!

SH- Seriously? Why didn't you tell me that earlier? OK, so Erixon headlines the deal. Who else can you give me in it?

GS- Hmmmm, who do you want?

SH- Well we need an exciting player for the fans. How about Chris Kreider?

GS- I have a better idea. Artem Anisimov had an amazing celebration against the Tampa Bay Lightning. One of my friends is a Columbus Blue Jackets fan and he said it was "cool." Cool! You can't beat that Scott!

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SH- So that's two players. I want Jaomir Jagr.

GS- But Scott, he's a Star.

SH- I know he's great, that's why I want him.

GS- No, he's on Dallas.

SH- The TV show? He can do that and hockey? That's awesome.

GS- Wow, you really are dumb. No Jagr, I don't think that would work. How about a 1st rounder instead?

SH- What pick do you think you will have?

GS- Well we expect to make it to the same spot or further, so 28th-30th pick.

SH- How about that and a 3rd?

GS- Alright, we'll take a 3rd! Can you throw in a minor league d-man?

SH- I meant we get the 3rd rounder. I'll give you the 3rd rounder if we can have Carl Hagelin.

GS- Y'know Carl Hagelin is too fast for Columbus. You guys need someone that can really get angry, win some fights, do some dirty work, grow a mean mustache, and beat up some water coolers. Brandon Dubinsky!

SH- How was he last season?

GS- How are the wife and kids?

SH- How was he last season?

GS- Did you see The Dark Knight Rises?

SH- How was he last season?

GS- Do you want to know how I got these cigars? Get it? Like scars? From The Dark Knight?

SH- If I make this deal will you get out of my office?

GS- Sure, tell crazy yelling man I say hello.

SH- I'll tell Mr. Prospal. Why do I feel like I just got fleeced?

GS- Because you did.