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The Rangers win nothing, will be drafting 9th

Pandas are just the worst.

Giant Panda Celebrates Birthday At Adelaide Zoo Photo by Morne de Klerk/Getty Images

Tonight the hockey gods collectively spat in the mouth of the New York Rangers organization. Xiangmao, the ceremonial NHL Draft Lottery Panda, came out of her bamboo-riddled cave holding a large, blue cardboard nine. As is tradition, the will of the ceremonial Panda must be obeyed — the Rangers will have the ninth overall pick in the 2018 NHL Draft. That is unless Jeff Gorton chooses to exercise his right to an appeal that must include an elaborate, outrageous gift for the dread lord panda.

Giant Panda's At Yantai Nanshan Park Zoo
You cruel, heartless bastard. How could you do this to us?
Photo by VCG/VCG via Getty Images

The Rangers had a 36 percent chance of leaving tonight with the ninth overall pick and a 36.8 percent chance of staying put at the eight spot. Never trust a panda.