Rangers Vs. Detroit: It Was Bad But At Least It Took A Long Time

I awoke to snow on the ground, a dysfunctional heater, a dead car battery, and this text:

“I am seriously asking this: has Shatty every scored on the shootout as a NYR?”

Good morning, Rangerstown! Let’s jump right into it, shall we?

The answer: yes, Kevin Shattenkirk has scored on the shootout as a Ranger: on November 26 against the Canucks. He did NOT score on December 11 vs. Dallas, December 21 against  the Devils, or on December 29 against Detroit. And yes, one could argue that means maybe it’s time to give him a rest and try, oh, say, the guy who did this:

Or Kevin Hayes, who was a monster at both ends all night. Or even the one bright spot in the game, rookie Vinni Lettieri, who scored his first NHL goal with a reflex one-timer that A FEW PEOPLE I KNOW WHO DIDDLE AROUND WITH THE PUCK TOO MUCH COULD MAYBE LEARN SOMETHING FROM.

Henrik Lundqvist had another hell of a night. Maybe he’s given up on these fools and decided to focus on another Vezina for himself. Godspeed, Hanky. I mean, LOOK AT THIS.

And this:

But it was a weird night from the get-go, what with SAM AND JOE of all people pointing out the discrepancy between Pavel Buchnevich’s production and his playing time. They noted that, in spite of averaging only 14:39 of ice time, Buch has 2.77 points per 60; this is about the closest I’ve ever heard them come to criticizing Vigneault’s decisions.

And it’s hard not to, considering that the way these games are going attest that the Blueshirts need as much firepower as possible on the ice at all times. I’m guessing that Chris Kreider would have made the difference last night, if not by scoring, at least with that huge, immovable screen he provides in front of the net. Even so, Jimmy Howard played his usual near-perfect anti-Rangers game. Hell, the guy was gleeful before the puck even dropped, so I can’t imagine what he looked like afterward.

Detroit’s goals were off Ranger missteps. Yes, Andreas Athanasiou is fast as f***, but I maintain that Holden could have done more here, like knock the puck out of reach instead of slashing him in the shin. Ryan McDonagh was in position behind him.

And poor Boo Nieves basked in the glow of his beautiful assist to Lettieri for only minutes before this happened:

After that, I’m not sure which was sadder: a beaten-looking Brady Skjei’s penalty shot attempt, or the Lettieri family after the loss ...

Nope. I can’t do it. No more GIFs. We have to end on an up note for the WINTER CLASSIC, right??? Because BUFFALO BEAT THE DEVILS LAST NIGHT! And we’ve got to believe that the best thing about that epic event won’t be the jerseys. RIGHT?

drags self back to bed